Yes, resentment is a bitter feeling of being treated unfairly. And you ought to feel this if you are maintaining scores with any individual – be it your colleague, friend, partner, boss, parents.
Name it and you will regret it.
So, what is KEEPING SCORES?
In simple terms, a little malicious tit-for-tat game most people use, to remind others what they contribute towards the relationship/friendship/colleagueship.
And here is a reality check, no one really cares about silly scorecards you keep updating in your mind.
One of the main reasons for keeping scores is “EGOCENTRIC BIAS”
A few words from my personal experience.
Never help people with the intent of getting something in return.
Help if you want to.
Don’t act selfless when you’re selfish.
Go with the flow.
Be the bigger person.
Build your knowledge dynamically.
Don’t be selfish about personal results, work on team results!
Stop remembering things you do for others.
Don’t go out of your way to help people. Give them subtle hints.
Stop blaming people of their previous mistakes.
Explain instead of arguing.
Think twice before you react.
Concluding this post, I want to say a thing that encourages me, and so I do it to encourage others!
Appreciate the other person
Yes! Learn to appreciate the person even for their smallest goals and achievements. Even if they have not done anything special, appreciate, or confess your love for your partner once in a while.
Sometimes, even if the other person knows what they mean to you, just tell it out. Give words to your feelings, or happiness.
Communicate! This is my solution for not keeping scores. When you’re happy with your friend, boss, or spouse – You don’t need scorecards.
Hope this helped you. Also, tell me your unique way of dealing with a person without scorecards, and expressing gratitude towards them in the comments below.